Relationships

 

Recently a friend retuned one of our favorite movies, Russia House.  It made me think of how the main character “Barley” came to realize that what he most cherished was the loving relationship he developed with “Katya” the Russian woman he was supposed to use to ferret out more secrets from the Russian scientist who leaked volumes of information about The Soviet’s faulty missile program.

Early in the movie Barley told the British spymaster, “You are fools to use me.  I let people down.”   But late in the story he told Katya, “You are my country now,” and later, “I love you; and I won’t let you down.”   And he didn’t.

He double crossed the Brits by passing information to the KGB to bargain for his and Katy’s family’s safe passage to Portugal.  The movie ends with their joyful reunion with Barley on the dock in Lisbon Harbor.  Our lesson from this story is: we can find peace here in this crazy world within holy relationships. What does that mean?

In the Chapters about specialness in the Course Jesus teaches us about special love and special hate relationships, and then Holy Relationships.  Simply put; in special love and special hate relationships we demand that the other person give us something we think they have that we think we need.  Such relationships are based on getting.

I’ve attended several workshops at FACIM about special relationships, and the discussions about them are long and involved.  It’s because such relationships occur with many forms, nevertheless, they all have the same content: you have what I want and I will get it from you!!

Discussions of Holy relationships are brief because they have the same form and content.  In them we ask for nothing, and see the other person as part of God’s one son.  Holy relationships are varied permutations of the Golden Rule in practice; based on giving and extending love.

In, The Great Transformation: The Beginning of our Religious Traditions, Karen Anderson outlines the various versions of the Golden Rule from the Babylonians, to Confucius, to Buddha, to Jewish and Christian. She begins;      Each tradition developed its own formulation of the golden rule:  do not do to others what you would not have done to you.                     (Anderson XIX)

Confucius; Never do to others what you would not like them to do to you.  (Anderson 247)

Jewish Rabbi Hillel , “What is hateful to yourself, do not do to your fellow man.  That is the whole of the Torah, the remainder is but commentary.  Go learn it.    (Anderson 453)

And centuries later ACIM,    Offer him thorns and you are crucified.  Offer him lilies and it is yourself you free.  I have great need for lilies, for the Son of God has not forgiven me.  (ACIM T-9.II.3.8-9) and,

Because I will to know myself, I see you as God’s son and my brother. ( ACIM  T-9.II12.6)  and,

These ideas help in our day-to-day journey here by reminding us in every moment to give to others instead of trying to get something.  A better way is to extend loving acts and thoughts.

How difficult is that?  Very.  Given the overwhelming prevalence of the opposite type of personal interaction we experience in our daily lives.

But, behavior fused with extension of love and loving thoughts is infectious.

If we build on that others will respond in a more loving manner.